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Sunday, January 09, 2005

Jan 8 - The Anxious Wait

I was anxious about going to pub on Sat nite. I had been hoping since last week...there might be a good chance of me joining my ex since he said he might be going. I asked Gavin and Chris if they are going, but they are not sure. Well, I practically search through my whole cupboard for a suitable pair of top to go with my black pants, none seems fit. What can I say, I've put on weight since I worked in Dell and also during my courtship with my ex. His mom cooks lots of dishes which are my favourites. Oh...I lost 4 kgs when I went into depression after my break with my ex. Unfortunately, I gained back 3kg now.

So, yesterday, Sat noon, my bf called when I was still in dreamland, he said he was on his way...hmmm...he likes to do that, coming unexpectedly. After lunch at Genting coffee shop, we went to Prangin Mall in town for shopping as I told him I wanna buy clothes. Of coz I did not say it's to shop for a top for my pubbing at night. Earlier, I told him I will be going join'g my schoolmates at Glo. He asked who...gee...I did not know which names to say, so I said I tell also no use coz he dunno them...but he said, u tell now, then I ma know later....in the end, I said Peck Lin, and that she will fetch me...ok ok...I know I am lying again...but what else can I do ? I do not want him to follow....anyway, it was my ex who gave me this idea :P

I realised I suddenly was searching thru clothes which I never lay eyes on...those colourful or black sexy top, spagetthi straps, ribbons or frill here and there, bare back tops...boy, it was hard to find, mostly transparent...finally, I found one spagetthi strap with V cutting at the chest, just nice, not to low...and it was only RM 29.90 ! Good deal I thought, then I bought a pair of heels, for work. I also got myself 3 pairs of earrings...3 pairs for only RM 12.90. I am a budget shopper when it's necessary, nowaday cannot spend on too luxury stuff, have to think thrice ! Lower pay, no OT, wanna buy car and bf not doing well financially....so I guess I have to control lo.

I called my ex when I went to the ladies (my bf was waiting outside) !! I asked if he's confirm going to Glo with his friends...he said not sure, maybe going after his PC games in town. So I thought, I cannot get him to fetch me...which means I might not be going unless I ask Chris if he wanna go....Gavin also not going....sigh !!

After dinner with my bf at Supertanker hawker, I asked him to send me home directly, he was curious why so early, I told him my friends not confirm what time, I dun wanna rush when they call me. Reluctantly, he sent me home by 8.30pm. I SMSed my ex, ask'g if he's really going...if not next time lo. Then, I took my shower...was shampooing my hair when he called me. He said he's not sure yet as waiting for his bro's friends (he met them at Glo last week on NY eve but his bro doesn't join them for pubbing). Then he suggested it's not a good idea for me to join them if my friends not going...coz he already announced he is single and that his bro's frens knew I was his ex, somemore there'll be some Dell colleagues, so he said it's awkward for him to be seen with me. I was upset and disappointed, so I was quiet for a while and then said " Ok la...nothing liao, I wanna continue my shower ". Actually I was shivering but I wanna hear his voice ma. After shower, I thought for a while...I must not let him feeling angry at me...it will only make him to find other girls or enjoy himself more...so, I called him back, told him I was in the shower just now, and it's ok, I will join in next time lo, ask him to enjoy himself. I think he was surprise that I wasn't angry after all.


Well, what else to do after such a disappointment? Of coz try my top and earrings and heels which I just bought. I was admiring myself in the mirror when my hp rang at 9.13pm, my ex called me...
"Hey, that foodcourt near yr house, close on which day?"
I said I have no idea, but today Sat should have la. I asked why, he said he forgot he hasn't taken dinner, so wanna go there to eat since it's near....I asked who is joining him there....he then asked if I wanna join him, a short while only coz after that he'll go to town for his cybercafe games.


I quickly changed...wore a black low cut singlet with my expensive Wacoal bra ( I already had it on while trying just now). By 9.23pm, I was in his car, he had to wait for awhile as he was early. I did not eat as I had fried maggi tomyam and belachan fried chicken with my bf earlier. 'Tah Pao' Aki's pancake for dad. We talked abit...he receive n make some calls in between...I was trying hard to keep a straight face when I overhead they are going to pub later...10.30pm. He then called Kevin, his colleague (from KL, the one who looks like Yoke Shen). He asked if Melissa wanna follow (Melissa actually likes Kevin but Kevin only having a fling with her as his gf is in Taiwan). After hanging up, my ex said " Nah...dun say I dun think of you...if Melissa goes, then it's ok for u to join, at least u wun be the only girl". But, still, the word "IF".

My ex again borrowed my room to change, while I was in the toilet. He felt pai seh when I took off my jeans in front of him. He then went downstairs for me to change...I told my dad I will be late, he didn't even ask where I am going or what time coming back...I think he must be shaking his head inside, hehehe. Either that, he trusts my ex, I guess.

Within 5 mins, I had on the new top I bought, one of the earrings set, light make-up, orange n purple eyeshadow, foundation powder...perfume of coz !
Off we went, first to fetch his bro's fren at BJC, next Kevin & Melissa at N Park...GLO, here we come !


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