Christmas Eve

It's Christmas eve today...in fact 2 weeks ago, I already had this sad feeling...I miss last Christmas. That was the first time he gave me a surprise, first time he really put effort, makes me feel so special. He booked a place for dinner...way before Christmas. We had dinner by the pool with live band singing...i will never forget last Christmas.

This year...today, it would never be the same. He's no longer mine. I called him yesterday, asked if he's going anywhere yet. He said dunno. His colleague, Cheok whom he hangs out with alot, has gone back to KL to visit his dad. Then another colleague Jethro is away for holiday. His look-alike-best-pal, SL will be attending party with his gf. So, he's not sure what to do.

As for me, I won't be joining my current bf tonight, at least I don't plan to. He will be fetching his close pal from airport at around 8.30pm and then to dinner...asked me to join but I don't feel like it, although I know Mei Leng from Dell (used to be in Finance). They got close from playing badminton. Initially, I wanted to book a place to celebrate but before I managed to do so, he asked if I am ok if he meets her tonight. Of course I say ok. Dun mistaken, I am not jealous, but ...u know....why today ? X'mas eve maaa....sigh ~~!! Never mind...so I told him to go ahead, I will find my own plans. He insisted I follow or see me after that, he said got something to give me. I already know what he's giving me. I read his MSN chat log ( I know I shouldn't but I think I cannot trust him ever since he told me he still loves Shirin)...he asked Mei Leng to buy me something from Singapore.

Anyway, back to my ex, I told him last nite, if he really has nothing to do and feel "mou liu", then perhaps 2 "mou liu" ppl can at least go out and have dinner or something ma. He laughed and said he will let me know how.

So here I am, 3.14pm, at work, but nothing to do, anxiously waiting and wondering if he will really call me tonight.
3.19pm - he calls me !! Yes, my-ex calls me ! He said "Tonite 10pm, movie...Gurney. We go for dinner around there first. I'll pick you up at around 6.30pm". Wow !! Sounds like everything arranged and I cannot even reject if I wanted to, not that I would, I was smiling to myself...but another part of me was worried how my bf's gonna take it if he knows...should I tell him ? Hmm...I feel bad...for doing this, but I cannot let go of my ex.

Counting down...thanks and praise the Lord for answering my prayers !! This is the best X'mas gift I had. Hallelujah !!