LX SMSed
19-0-05 8:40pm Wed
Later can i see u, i miss u very much...
we eat supper, ok
I replied "ok, call u later". I was watching American Idol, yesterday 1st show, entertaining. Finished at 10pm, I went upstairs, toilet, then called him. Asked what time he had dinner, he said 9pm, so I said no need la since he also not hungry. He said ok, but could sense his disappointment. Then I burnt some CDs for Sako (third aunt), he called back...said he miss me. Just wanted to hear my voice. Said he 'boh kam muan' I dun give him chance. Talked (actually din really talk, was quiet most of the time), then he finally hang up after said goodnite.
He called
19-01-05 11:16:54pm Wed
Just apprx. 10 seconds after LX hung up, my ex called me. He asked if I have taken dinner or wanna go 'lim teh'. He already had dinner, just wanna go out for drinks. Wow, improvement (I thought to myself)...and furthermore, I did not SMS or call him earlier. But I did email him in office telling him that LX said wanna return me $.
Told him I was writing CD for my aunt, he said he would wait if arrive early, but I had to wait instead. Dad was surprised I am going out to makan, he said just now I had big pack of rice, then eat again ? Hehehe....actually digested liao ma.
Went to Khaleel Nasi Kandar near USM, I had maggi mee goreng, he - fried ice-cream. We talked awhile, then he got call, he walked away and talked for almost 15 minutes. I was abit unhappy, wondering who he was talking to... I watched the big screen, they had the pirated VCD on Tsunami clips. When he returned, he apologised. He said it's call from his Tech Support agent...( hehee, me smiling inside :P ).
He asked me curiously if LX has any chance, he asked " Are u sure LX dun have any chance liao ? "
I told him I do not think so, at least at this moment, I dun wanna think about it, LX is very possessive. He made me frustrated many times...when I went out with my friends, LX was not happy and went out with Shirin instead to get even...I don't like that. Damage done....well...it will take some time or a lot of effort from LX. ( Moreover I still cannot let go of my ex...but I cannot say that to him ).
I told him I did ask a few of my girl colleagues if they wanna go pubbing, one very pretty but vegetarian, she said her bf must be same...another pretty also, stays in Air Itam, no transport but cannot go back too late...he said my kang tao really problem...hehehe. He said maybe Thurs nite (eve of Raya Qurban), Ah Kwan (his bro's friends) might be going to pub again but he himself cannot, coz working on Pub. Holiday. He said if I want, I can join them...walau eh, I said I dun dare la...not very close to them.
Went home almost 1am, showered, transfer some files from my memory key to pc...went to bed already 2am ++. Hiya....sleep late again lo.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Jan 19 - Build rapport
Make more friends, esp. with those who are helpful, then u r already helping yourself.
Morning morning, saw 2 mails from my big boss...this time, me kena put on table to solve another cleanup issue. But luckily I am not the only one, Soo Fong and Toh Way also in the team. I think big boss wants me to learn. I took the opportunity to ask Soo Fong teach me on my file with the 8k + items. She is very helpful...she must be God sent angel...thank you thank you Lord !
Morning morning, saw 2 mails from my big boss...this time, me kena put on table to solve another cleanup issue. But luckily I am not the only one, Soo Fong and Toh Way also in the team. I think big boss wants me to learn. I took the opportunity to ask Soo Fong teach me on my file with the 8k + items. She is very helpful...she must be God sent angel...thank you thank you Lord !
Jan 18 - The reasons revealed
I reached home already 10.30pm. The wedding dinner ok...Boon Ee looks pretty in her yellow gown. Chee Woei (her husband) and her sang Jacky Cheung's song. She has this nice green floral design which sparkles on her back till her upper arm.
Gavin and I sat with a bunch of aunties and uncles...later Soon Lay Tat (Finance - Taiwan) came with gf-to-be as the girl said they are not couple. She looks nice, matching la. The food, I find it a bit too salty though.
Saw Choo Sing, Oy Fui, Brandon and Elyss, Pui Geik, Ewe Jin, Vivien, Bee Hoon & William and of course Sue who never miss out any 'makan' function. They sat together. Music was loud as the speaker was quite near, we had to 'shout' when talking...got ppl came in to sell Chinese newspapers, loud cheers and 'yum seng' occasionally heard...beers....hmmm....these are what I would like to avoid if it's my own wedding. No alcohol, my family/relatives should be ok, but not sure abt my future other half. But I knew LX cannot...the other day when we attended his friend's weddings, we sort of talked abt how ours would be, when I mentioned the above, he said cannot, if no alcohol, might as well no need to have the dinner....duh ~~!!
But anyway, this is not an issue anymore.
I called
18-01-05 11:06:40pm
After my shower, called my ex. He was outside eating, he asked if I have taken my dinner. I said already. Waa...he sounded like a bit guilty did not ask me. I did not ask who he was with.
Told him later I had to call LX to discuss abt our relationship.
I called
19-01-05 12:24:17am
After 1 hour and 12 mins talking to LX, sometimes anger, sometimes frustration got into me...I called my ex to blurt out to him. He listened but say he has no comments...told him I just need an ear. He belum mandi, told me he went out with his bro. for dinner. Then we talked abt maybe going to pub this weekend. He was reluctant for me to follow him, scared ppl think we are back together. Asked me to get some girl friends...but told him my colleagues dun have transport...he asked, pretty or not, if pretty, he can fetch...duh ~~!! Never mind, if he wants, he will ask me along, let's see...not gonna pester him.
So, what happended to LX and me ? I told LX all my concerns, he was sad. He kept comparing and brought out my past with my ex. I told him it was different. He asked if can still work things out, last time he also work things out with his ex...again, wanna compare....sigh ~~!! Told him I prefer to be single for now, dun wanna think about this too much, wanna be free and able to go anywhere I like with anyone and not having to report to him all the time. He said he was a little angry with me...just like I was angry with my ex when we broke off (walau eh, why he kept touching on my past with my ex?!). I got pissed off ! I think I was a little harsh when I talked to him.
I told him we couldn't trust each other, he kept checking my SMS, call logs, diary...He said he read my diary is b'coz girls always complain their bf not concern or jealous...but I said I never complain, but then he said his ex does, I told him, I am not her...but he argued that I complained my ex when he was not concern, I said, it was different...my relationship with my ex was very deep. I know that must hurt him even more, but I was really angry that he kept mentioning abt my ex.
In the end, LX said, we shall remain friends.
Gavin and I sat with a bunch of aunties and uncles...later Soon Lay Tat (Finance - Taiwan) came with gf-to-be as the girl said they are not couple. She looks nice, matching la. The food, I find it a bit too salty though.
Saw Choo Sing, Oy Fui, Brandon and Elyss, Pui Geik, Ewe Jin, Vivien, Bee Hoon & William and of course Sue who never miss out any 'makan' function. They sat together. Music was loud as the speaker was quite near, we had to 'shout' when talking...got ppl came in to sell Chinese newspapers, loud cheers and 'yum seng' occasionally heard...beers....hmmm....these are what I would like to avoid if it's my own wedding. No alcohol, my family/relatives should be ok, but not sure abt my future other half. But I knew LX cannot...the other day when we attended his friend's weddings, we sort of talked abt how ours would be, when I mentioned the above, he said cannot, if no alcohol, might as well no need to have the dinner....duh ~~!!
But anyway, this is not an issue anymore.
I called
18-01-05 11:06:40pm
After my shower, called my ex. He was outside eating, he asked if I have taken my dinner. I said already. Waa...he sounded like a bit guilty did not ask me. I did not ask who he was with.
Told him later I had to call LX to discuss abt our relationship.
I called
19-01-05 12:24:17am
After 1 hour and 12 mins talking to LX, sometimes anger, sometimes frustration got into me...I called my ex to blurt out to him. He listened but say he has no comments...told him I just need an ear. He belum mandi, told me he went out with his bro. for dinner. Then we talked abt maybe going to pub this weekend. He was reluctant for me to follow him, scared ppl think we are back together. Asked me to get some girl friends...but told him my colleagues dun have transport...he asked, pretty or not, if pretty, he can fetch...duh ~~!! Never mind, if he wants, he will ask me along, let's see...not gonna pester him.
So, what happended to LX and me ? I told LX all my concerns, he was sad. He kept comparing and brought out my past with my ex. I told him it was different. He asked if can still work things out, last time he also work things out with his ex...again, wanna compare....sigh ~~!! Told him I prefer to be single for now, dun wanna think about this too much, wanna be free and able to go anywhere I like with anyone and not having to report to him all the time. He said he was a little angry with me...just like I was angry with my ex when we broke off (walau eh, why he kept touching on my past with my ex?!). I got pissed off ! I think I was a little harsh when I talked to him.
I told him we couldn't trust each other, he kept checking my SMS, call logs, diary...He said he read my diary is b'coz girls always complain their bf not concern or jealous...but I said I never complain, but then he said his ex does, I told him, I am not her...but he argued that I complained my ex when he was not concern, I said, it was different...my relationship with my ex was very deep. I know that must hurt him even more, but I was really angry that he kept mentioning abt my ex.
In the end, LX said, we shall remain friends.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Jan 18 - I wanna be a Hawker !
Aiyo so pek cik today, just an hour before lunch, my big boss asked me to go over his cube. Drew some chart/process flow...talking in technical terms, then ask me to filter excel file with 8602 items !! I dunno the logic leh...memang penat ! Have to keep asking my colleagues, luckily she is nice and helpful but she also busy ma.
I wanna go sell laksa, chicken, whatsover la...anyone interested ? Hard work but fast money, somemore no need to crack my brains with those alien numbers !! I cannot deal with numbers...I would rather write an essay with 10,000 words ! I pray to God to let me get the job I apply in Dell...yep, going back to Hell if the offer is better...my target now is $$ !
Am waiting for Gavin to fetch me to Boon Ee's wedding...almost 7pm, still not yet ready. He got urgent shipment to rush...never mind, hopefully dun need to make grand entrance.
Ok, shall do some surfing or clear my junk mails, lately no time to see leh. Honeymoon period over.
Looking forward to this Friday ! Hari Raya Qurban !! I wanna sleep till late, yahoo!! But wait...I promised Yen Nee to go out with her....hmm....nvm, sleep later on Sat...but wait...I think I promised Kean Eng to go out....then Sunday lo...but but only one day nya. Sleep again next Tues !! Yes, that's life for now.
I wanna go sell laksa, chicken, whatsover la...anyone interested ? Hard work but fast money, somemore no need to crack my brains with those alien numbers !! I cannot deal with numbers...I would rather write an essay with 10,000 words ! I pray to God to let me get the job I apply in Dell...yep, going back to Hell if the offer is better...my target now is $$ !
Am waiting for Gavin to fetch me to Boon Ee's wedding...almost 7pm, still not yet ready. He got urgent shipment to rush...never mind, hopefully dun need to make grand entrance.
Ok, shall do some surfing or clear my junk mails, lately no time to see leh. Honeymoon period over.
Looking forward to this Friday ! Hari Raya Qurban !! I wanna sleep till late, yahoo!! But wait...I promised Yen Nee to go out with her....hmm....nvm, sleep later on Sat...but wait...I think I promised Kean Eng to go out....then Sunday lo...but but only one day nya. Sleep again next Tues !! Yes, that's life for now.
Jan 17 - LX wants to know WHY !
LX MSNed me
17-01-05 8.45am
tell me the truth... is it I occupied too much of your time??
I didn't let u have enough time to do ur personal thing??
Oh, guess what ? God has been real kind to me. My ex called me at 10:57pm when I was still chatting with my friends. He asked if I wanted to have dinner/supper. Told him I was outside, he said he will tah pao home to eat. Hehehehe....I called him at 1:06am to talk. He hasn't sleep yet, told him what LX did/wrote, then also told him my bro said he might sponsor me a little for my car...but I wonder if it's 4 digit, if so....hopefully starts with 5xxx !! Talked for about 10mins before I bathed and called LX later. He was already sleepy...so did not discuss abt his questions.
Oh, btw, LX mailed me the below but I have yet to reply or talk to him...
Jo,
I didn't know what should I do in order to have u back, I was thinking these few days... did I do anything wrong?? I really miss u very very much... we just started 2 months and u already said u wanna left me, it really hurt me very much... where is all our sweet memory goes, u forgot them all? or u didn't even keep them in your short term memory anymore...
I guess this is what happen when love disappear!! Meng Yeng and Shirin do this thing to me, and now u...
Monday, January 17, 2005
Jan 14 - 16 : LX and EX, hmm....
14th Jan 05 - This is the last time LX fetches me back from work, asked if he wants to watch movie, he said ok. So, we went to BJC...I wanted to watch ..."Meet the Fockers" but only screen at 12 midnight, so maybe "National Treasure" starring Nicolas Cage but he said he already downloaded into his PC. He suggested horror movie "The Doll Master", no way la !! I think Shutter was the last horror movie I watch, no more pls ! I am a bit chicken when it comes to horror movies !!
In the end, no movies, just dinner, Kenny Rogers...Sze Chuan flavour, ok ok la...spicy and sour taste, original flavour still the best la. Went home after that, dad was surprise that I am back early.
I called
14-01-05 10:56:02pm
My ex was in office, working, just reached office he said, talk later wor... I went downstairs to read newspaper and watched Astro or rather Astro watched me.
Not expecting anything and almost ready to go upstairs to rest or sleep maybe...suddenly the familiar "The Entertainer" tone sang again :)
He called
15-01-05 01:23:18am
Went out supper with him at Sungai Dua, malay stall, nearby KFC. Had fried koay teow. Talk awhile...this time he seems supportive of my decision. He said it's mainly LX's fault that cause me to lose my feelings. Went back around 2.30am, by the time I went to bed, it was 3am, but I was still very much awake, I think I finally fell asleep at around 4am. Never mind, tomorrow Saturday.
Saturday morning 9.30a, woke up, stomache, aiya, it's the colon cleanser I took last nite, so had to go empty my bowels...duh !!
Went back to sleep, 10.50am, Gavin SMSed me...asked what I was doing, any function...I replied back "No la...sleeping at home". Then he so notty, SMSed back ask'g sleeping at LX's house ah ? I called him, he asked if wanna go shopping...hmm...actually me very sleepy but it's ok la, long time din accompany him liao, some more he always so nice, so concern abt me. He said he will SMS Chris. Too bad YN has to work, otherwise can go lepak together. But Chris did not join after all.
By 12noon, I was ready downstairs, Gavin called back some 15mins later informing me that he's waiting for doctor, something growth in between his thumb and index finger. Finally at 1pm, he came. Went to Gurney Plaza, sales at Padini, Seed, etc. Bumped into Sales Chia Yin and Sok Peng with their fiance/bf in front of jewellery shops. They din realise I had left Dell for 6 months !!
After lunch at Chopper Board, Gavin & I went browsing, MPH, clothes, clothes and clothes !! I couldn't find anything nice. I bought a pair of earrings and a choker, but guess what ?? I left it at Coffee Bean ler....sigh ~~~!! Never mind la, what a lesson for a forgetful person like me. It didn't cost much, but I really love them ! Gavin told me it's not in his car....boo hoo ~~ !!
LX called me twice that day, once just as I was about to stepped in Gurney, he asked if I had woke up or had my lunch, then he asked who I was with, could hear he was disappointed or expected me to have lunch with him.
Another time was at 4.30pm, he asked if I am still shopping. Then, he asked if I wanna watch "National Treasure", I asked where, he said his house as he had downloaded into his pc, I said, u go ahead watch first la. I know he miss me alot.
I called
15-01-05 06:03:49pm
Called him to see if he's going down, no answer.
Then I called LX to see how he was. Asked if he has taken lunch or dinner, he told me none at all...so I asked if he wanted to hv dinner. He said he's still watching "National Treasure" and will end soon...ok, so I told him to miss-call me when he's coming over. I laid around for awhile, feet tired from all those walking...hehehe.
Then had a quick shower...hmm...try my luck again, call my ex...
I called
15-01-05 6:28:15pm
Again, no answer...hmm...maybe busy...
He called
15-01-05 07;04:01pm
Called me when I was having dinner with LX. He was on the way to fetch Kevin to Malacca. I managed to talk awhile esp. when LX went to order curry fish head. Told him I had to accompany LX since he belum makan lagi...then he said ok la...and goodbye, told him to take care.
After dinner, LX dropped me off. He was very quiet. Dad was really curious I was back early on Sat. nite. He asked me why so early ? As usual, I just smile....hehehehe....
Later I send a 2 SMS to my ex, one to tell him why I went out with LX and another much later, to ask him drive safely.
He SMSed
In kl, having
supper now. After
that wil go melaka
I SMSed
Ok, drive safely or hv good rest if yr turn
to doze. Pls let me know once u reach, ok?
Prayers for u :)
I woke up in the middle of the nite, went to loo, checked my hp, no SMS...hmm...morning....also none. :[
I called
16:01-05 08:52:28pm
I called, no answer. Getting worried abt my ex.
Trying to read the Sunday Star and had the TV on...nothing interesting on Astro. Tired, cleaned my room since 4pm till 7.30pm. I sorted and file my bills, before I swept the floor, wiped my shelves, cleaned my air-cond and mopped the floor. Was so hungry, had to eat a packet of Mamee before I can proceed to wash my clothes and took my shower. Thank goodness dad said wanna fry sausages for me...I am so lucky !!
16-01-05 10:12pm
I SMSed
Hey, pls at least
let me know if u r
on the way or hv
reach Pg. I m
worried...
He called
16-01-05 10:14:39pm
Sleepily he told me he has reached. And he went back to sleep. Ok, at least I know he's back safely. Praise the Lord.
He called
16-01-05 10:59:16pm
This is very unexpected, asked me if I wanna go supper...I said ok but I had to call LX first as he was crying just now. I called back LX, lied to him that my bro came over, will talk abt us later or tomorrow, he sound ok compared to earlier when he called me. He asked if I still have feelings for him and why I changed. I just told him I wanted to have more time for myself, I want to do my own things, make more money (not sure if he gets the hint, but I think not).Then went downstairs, dad was asking, wahh...go out to eat again ? Coz earlier he fried 2 sausages for me which I ate with buns...but I had only 1.5. I just smiled....then went out to play with Ron my dog, while waiting for my ex.
Went round town...dunno where to eat at this hour, finally to a coffee shop with girls singing...lots of ah pek there drinking beer. I wanted to go to ladies when reached there, it was quite dark and I appreciate him waiting for me (though I did not ask him to) ;)
I only had teh ping, he had fried spaghetti and wan tan soup. This time, he sounded even more supportive of my decision, he kept asking if LX did manage to change and become more stable, will I consider back LX ? I said maybe, but preferably not. Then my ex said he would not blame me for my decision to break off, as LX did so many minor minor things to piss me off earlier...like kept comparing me with MY and Shirin, not showing up at work on time, use Shirin to 'kek' me when he thinks I dun spend enough time with him, no determination to work hard, etc....he advised me that I should be direct with LX abt all these including his future not being stable...
In the end, no movies, just dinner, Kenny Rogers...Sze Chuan flavour, ok ok la...spicy and sour taste, original flavour still the best la. Went home after that, dad was surprise that I am back early.
I called
14-01-05 10:56:02pm
My ex was in office, working, just reached office he said, talk later wor... I went downstairs to read newspaper and watched Astro or rather Astro watched me.
Not expecting anything and almost ready to go upstairs to rest or sleep maybe...suddenly the familiar "The Entertainer" tone sang again :)
He called
15-01-05 01:23:18am
Went out supper with him at Sungai Dua, malay stall, nearby KFC. Had fried koay teow. Talk awhile...this time he seems supportive of my decision. He said it's mainly LX's fault that cause me to lose my feelings. Went back around 2.30am, by the time I went to bed, it was 3am, but I was still very much awake, I think I finally fell asleep at around 4am. Never mind, tomorrow Saturday.
Saturday morning 9.30a, woke up, stomache, aiya, it's the colon cleanser I took last nite, so had to go empty my bowels...duh !!
Went back to sleep, 10.50am, Gavin SMSed me...asked what I was doing, any function...I replied back "No la...sleeping at home". Then he so notty, SMSed back ask'g sleeping at LX's house ah ? I called him, he asked if wanna go shopping...hmm...actually me very sleepy but it's ok la, long time din accompany him liao, some more he always so nice, so concern abt me. He said he will SMS Chris. Too bad YN has to work, otherwise can go lepak together. But Chris did not join after all.
By 12noon, I was ready downstairs, Gavin called back some 15mins later informing me that he's waiting for doctor, something growth in between his thumb and index finger. Finally at 1pm, he came. Went to Gurney Plaza, sales at Padini, Seed, etc. Bumped into Sales Chia Yin and Sok Peng with their fiance/bf in front of jewellery shops. They din realise I had left Dell for 6 months !!
After lunch at Chopper Board, Gavin & I went browsing, MPH, clothes, clothes and clothes !! I couldn't find anything nice. I bought a pair of earrings and a choker, but guess what ?? I left it at Coffee Bean ler....sigh ~~~!! Never mind la, what a lesson for a forgetful person like me. It didn't cost much, but I really love them ! Gavin told me it's not in his car....boo hoo ~~ !!
LX called me twice that day, once just as I was about to stepped in Gurney, he asked if I had woke up or had my lunch, then he asked who I was with, could hear he was disappointed or expected me to have lunch with him.
Another time was at 4.30pm, he asked if I am still shopping. Then, he asked if I wanna watch "National Treasure", I asked where, he said his house as he had downloaded into his pc, I said, u go ahead watch first la. I know he miss me alot.
I called
15-01-05 06:03:49pm
Called him to see if he's going down, no answer.
Then I called LX to see how he was. Asked if he has taken lunch or dinner, he told me none at all...so I asked if he wanted to hv dinner. He said he's still watching "National Treasure" and will end soon...ok, so I told him to miss-call me when he's coming over. I laid around for awhile, feet tired from all those walking...hehehe.
Then had a quick shower...hmm...try my luck again, call my ex...
I called
15-01-05 6:28:15pm
Again, no answer...hmm...maybe busy...
He called
15-01-05 07;04:01pm
Called me when I was having dinner with LX. He was on the way to fetch Kevin to Malacca. I managed to talk awhile esp. when LX went to order curry fish head. Told him I had to accompany LX since he belum makan lagi...then he said ok la...and goodbye, told him to take care.
After dinner, LX dropped me off. He was very quiet. Dad was really curious I was back early on Sat. nite. He asked me why so early ? As usual, I just smile....hehehehe....
Later I send a 2 SMS to my ex, one to tell him why I went out with LX and another much later, to ask him drive safely.
He SMSed
In kl, having
supper now. After
that wil go melaka
I SMSed
Ok, drive safely or hv good rest if yr turn
to doze. Pls let me know once u reach, ok?
Prayers for u :)
I woke up in the middle of the nite, went to loo, checked my hp, no SMS...hmm...morning....also none. :[
I called
16:01-05 08:52:28pm
I called, no answer. Getting worried abt my ex.
Trying to read the Sunday Star and had the TV on...nothing interesting on Astro. Tired, cleaned my room since 4pm till 7.30pm. I sorted and file my bills, before I swept the floor, wiped my shelves, cleaned my air-cond and mopped the floor. Was so hungry, had to eat a packet of Mamee before I can proceed to wash my clothes and took my shower. Thank goodness dad said wanna fry sausages for me...I am so lucky !!
16-01-05 10:12pm
I SMSed
Hey, pls at least
let me know if u r
on the way or hv
reach Pg. I m
worried...
He called
16-01-05 10:14:39pm
Sleepily he told me he has reached. And he went back to sleep. Ok, at least I know he's back safely. Praise the Lord.
He called
16-01-05 10:59:16pm
This is very unexpected, asked me if I wanna go supper...I said ok but I had to call LX first as he was crying just now. I called back LX, lied to him that my bro came over, will talk abt us later or tomorrow, he sound ok compared to earlier when he called me. He asked if I still have feelings for him and why I changed. I just told him I wanted to have more time for myself, I want to do my own things, make more money (not sure if he gets the hint, but I think not).Then went downstairs, dad was asking, wahh...go out to eat again ? Coz earlier he fried 2 sausages for me which I ate with buns...but I had only 1.5. I just smiled....then went out to play with Ron my dog, while waiting for my ex.
Went round town...dunno where to eat at this hour, finally to a coffee shop with girls singing...lots of ah pek there drinking beer. I wanted to go to ladies when reached there, it was quite dark and I appreciate him waiting for me (though I did not ask him to) ;)
I only had teh ping, he had fried spaghetti and wan tan soup. This time, he sounded even more supportive of my decision, he kept asking if LX did manage to change and become more stable, will I consider back LX ? I said maybe, but preferably not. Then my ex said he would not blame me for my decision to break off, as LX did so many minor minor things to piss me off earlier...like kept comparing me with MY and Shirin, not showing up at work on time, use Shirin to 'kek' me when he thinks I dun spend enough time with him, no determination to work hard, etc....he advised me that I should be direct with LX abt all these including his future not being stable...
Friday, January 14, 2005
Jan 14 - LX will wait for me...
LX SMSed
14-01-05 09:28:49am
I started to miss u
last night n felt
loneliness... I just
hope u will come
back to me soon.
I was busy at work when I felt vibration on my right pocket (Jacket). I was actually hoping my ex SMS me...hmm...LX...he's upset...i gave him a quick call before I went over to Chin Keow's place. Abit busy today, have to back up Yoot Wah as well (emergency leave). I heard noisy background, he told me he was in bank.
Bank at 9.30am?? How abt work ? I asked why he couldn't wait till next Monday when he is on noon shift ? Sigh ~~ !! He couldn't hear me...so I sent him SMS, said talk later.
Later before lunch, LX called me. I asked why he had to go today, he said had to change his PBB ATM card and something to do with his granny's money...Hmm, u know what I think ? I think it's not really urgent and again, he's taking his working hours to do personal things as and when he likes.
Just like yesterday, he said Penang Bridge jammed due to accident, Ronnie sent him SMS at 7.25am. He said he went back to sleep since jam is bad. Then went for breakfast, turned back 2 rounds (still jammed) before finally went to work. Told me Ronnie reached at 8 something, Selina (his ex boss) reached at 9.30am, but him ? Almost 10.30 am !! Walau eh...boss ka? I told him not to be like that in new company. I really dun like it.
Seriously, I hope he does not wait for me...I know he can really sayang me...but how is he gonna take care of me or the family in future ? I realise love alone is not enough. Welcome to the Real World, Joe !!
14-01-05 09:28:49am
I started to miss u
last night n felt
loneliness... I just
hope u will come
back to me soon.
I was busy at work when I felt vibration on my right pocket (Jacket). I was actually hoping my ex SMS me...hmm...LX...he's upset...i gave him a quick call before I went over to Chin Keow's place. Abit busy today, have to back up Yoot Wah as well (emergency leave). I heard noisy background, he told me he was in bank.
Bank at 9.30am?? How abt work ? I asked why he couldn't wait till next Monday when he is on noon shift ? Sigh ~~ !! He couldn't hear me...so I sent him SMS, said talk later.
Later before lunch, LX called me. I asked why he had to go today, he said had to change his PBB ATM card and something to do with his granny's money...Hmm, u know what I think ? I think it's not really urgent and again, he's taking his working hours to do personal things as and when he likes.
Just like yesterday, he said Penang Bridge jammed due to accident, Ronnie sent him SMS at 7.25am. He said he went back to sleep since jam is bad. Then went for breakfast, turned back 2 rounds (still jammed) before finally went to work. Told me Ronnie reached at 8 something, Selina (his ex boss) reached at 9.30am, but him ? Almost 10.30 am !! Walau eh...boss ka? I told him not to be like that in new company. I really dun like it.
Seriously, I hope he does not wait for me...I know he can really sayang me...but how is he gonna take care of me or the family in future ? I realise love alone is not enough. Welcome to the Real World, Joe !!
Jan 13 - Single yet not so single...
I SMSed
13-01-05 09:18pm
Just now I took my few things back from his place.
This time the feeling is different from your place.
He SMSed
13-01-05 10:47:22pm
Hey..If u want
supper, i pick u in
20min.
I SMSed
13-01-05 10:48pm
Ok, c u
This time, it looks like norm for us to go for supper. Went to Taman Pekaka. We had dry koay teow, nice and cheap, only RM 2 got 4 meat/fish balls in the koay teow n another 4 balls in the small soup bowl. I told him I just asked my dad to fetch me next week but I left out the word "Onwards". My ex taught me...he suggested to tell my dad that my LX (Latest eX) changed job and time not 'ngam'. I 'perli' him...sudah pandai create white lies.
He was concern abt how and who else joining him to Cheok's father's funeral in Malacca. Going Sat. nite. Told him to think over coz it will be very tiring if he's driving alone. And where is he gonna stay overnite, most likely he won't be sleeping at all since Cheok will be bz ma. He listened n was then in thought.
We left at 12am. I was quite tired. Showered again, changed my clothes, say my prayers, ready to sleep...not sure if I should still expect LX to call me after his badminton...hmm...I decided to call him to avoid him waking me later...but he was already calling me at the same time. Hah ! So, we talked a while...could feel he was sad...he said he miss me...I could then understand how my ex felt when I said I missed him...so it was rather useless to keep saying I love him or miss him...coz at that time my ex already made up his mind about us. I did not respond but talked something else. I know how hurt LX is but I dun wanna give him more hope. I hope he will understand later. I prayed to God that LX will be able to find his true love and will do well in his career and future.
He will still fetch me from work on Friday, supposed to be last time he fetches me lo. I took my things back. He even helped me...I feel so sorry for him...that was all I felt...I dun wanna think more...if I think deeper, I know I will cry as well. But I guess this is the best for him.
13-01-05 09:18pm
Just now I took my few things back from his place.
This time the feeling is different from your place.
He SMSed
13-01-05 10:47:22pm
Hey..If u want
supper, i pick u in
20min.
I SMSed
13-01-05 10:48pm
Ok, c u
This time, it looks like norm for us to go for supper. Went to Taman Pekaka. We had dry koay teow, nice and cheap, only RM 2 got 4 meat/fish balls in the koay teow n another 4 balls in the small soup bowl. I told him I just asked my dad to fetch me next week but I left out the word "Onwards". My ex taught me...he suggested to tell my dad that my LX (Latest eX) changed job and time not 'ngam'. I 'perli' him...sudah pandai create white lies.
He was concern abt how and who else joining him to Cheok's father's funeral in Malacca. Going Sat. nite. Told him to think over coz it will be very tiring if he's driving alone. And where is he gonna stay overnite, most likely he won't be sleeping at all since Cheok will be bz ma. He listened n was then in thought.
We left at 12am. I was quite tired. Showered again, changed my clothes, say my prayers, ready to sleep...not sure if I should still expect LX to call me after his badminton...hmm...I decided to call him to avoid him waking me later...but he was already calling me at the same time. Hah ! So, we talked a while...could feel he was sad...he said he miss me...I could then understand how my ex felt when I said I missed him...so it was rather useless to keep saying I love him or miss him...coz at that time my ex already made up his mind about us. I did not respond but talked something else. I know how hurt LX is but I dun wanna give him more hope. I hope he will understand later. I prayed to God that LX will be able to find his true love and will do well in his career and future.
He will still fetch me from work on Friday, supposed to be last time he fetches me lo. I took my things back. He even helped me...I feel so sorry for him...that was all I felt...I dun wanna think more...if I think deeper, I know I will cry as well. But I guess this is the best for him.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Jan 12 - Another Surprise !! God is so Great !!
He called
12-01-05 11:04:13pm
Guess what ? He called !! Yes yes yes ~~~!! My ex called me. I was still posting my blog when I heard the familiar "The Entertainer" tone coming from my hp which I assigned only to him. He asked me what happended ? He thought I was stuck in my home toilet. Told him what happened. He then asked me if I wanted to join him for dinner. Actually I was hungry even after my Milo+Cereal. So I said Ok also la. He replied "Same la, coming over in 10 mins time".
We went to the same coffee shop in town, after Hotel Agora. I ordered Wan Tan Mee, he ordered Hokkien Loh coz he pai seh if did not 'pong chan' his school mate. Not enuff, he ordered Wan Tan Mee as well. We talked like normal. Told me Ah Cheok's dad passed away and he might be going to KL this Sat nite to pay respect if the funeral is not over yet. I gave him RM 20 for white gold. He said no need but I insisted coz I also know Ah Cheok ma. Asked me to remind him again on Fri just in case he forgot to pass to Cheok.
On the way back, he again asked abt his hair...so worried abt how he looks. I asked him how much he paid (RM 25) and when he's going again coz I thought of trying since not bad. Surprisingly, he said will let me know if he's going this Sat, can follow him (*** smiling***) !! God is with me !! God is GREAT !! Thank you thank you !!
Reached home by 1am...called LX. Slept around 2am. I was awaken by a sound at 5.20am....I thought I was dreaming...then as I was reaching for my bottle water, I heard some sound again (like something runninng swiftly). My first thought was ....snake ?? Nah...I sat up...afraid to put my foot down coz it was dark. I pull my curtain over abit...still not clear...then took my bottle...tried to make some noises...just to scare whatever it was...then I saw my hp on the floor, grabbed it, I use the light as torchlight....nothing....ohh...then I remembered, must be that little long tail with whiskers which I saw few months ago...I finally had the courage to put my foot down and very quickly, switched on the room's light. Looked around for some 5 mins...before I continue my dreams...
Ok, gotta go back to my work / training....
12-01-05 11:04:13pm
Guess what ? He called !! Yes yes yes ~~~!! My ex called me. I was still posting my blog when I heard the familiar "The Entertainer" tone coming from my hp which I assigned only to him. He asked me what happended ? He thought I was stuck in my home toilet. Told him what happened. He then asked me if I wanted to join him for dinner. Actually I was hungry even after my Milo+Cereal. So I said Ok also la. He replied "Same la, coming over in 10 mins time".
We went to the same coffee shop in town, after Hotel Agora. I ordered Wan Tan Mee, he ordered Hokkien Loh coz he pai seh if did not 'pong chan' his school mate. Not enuff, he ordered Wan Tan Mee as well. We talked like normal. Told me Ah Cheok's dad passed away and he might be going to KL this Sat nite to pay respect if the funeral is not over yet. I gave him RM 20 for white gold. He said no need but I insisted coz I also know Ah Cheok ma. Asked me to remind him again on Fri just in case he forgot to pass to Cheok.
On the way back, he again asked abt his hair...so worried abt how he looks. I asked him how much he paid (RM 25) and when he's going again coz I thought of trying since not bad. Surprisingly, he said will let me know if he's going this Sat, can follow him (*** smiling***) !! God is with me !! God is GREAT !! Thank you thank you !!
Reached home by 1am...called LX. Slept around 2am. I was awaken by a sound at 5.20am....I thought I was dreaming...then as I was reaching for my bottle water, I heard some sound again (like something runninng swiftly). My first thought was ....snake ?? Nah...I sat up...afraid to put my foot down coz it was dark. I pull my curtain over abit...still not clear...then took my bottle...tried to make some noises...just to scare whatever it was...then I saw my hp on the floor, grabbed it, I use the light as torchlight....nothing....ohh...then I remembered, must be that little long tail with whiskers which I saw few months ago...I finally had the courage to put my foot down and very quickly, switched on the room's light. Looked around for some 5 mins...before I continue my dreams...
Ok, gotta go back to my work / training....
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Jan 12 - Read the door sign !
I SMSed him
12-01-05 9:59pm
Just now stucked in toilet…door spoilt :[
Now is 10:05pm, he did not reply my sms…. L. Well, was with Yen Nee, Gavin and my LX (Latest eX) at the food court near my house. Went to toilet, LX followed and waited outside for me. There were 3 sections, I chose the one in the middle b’coz it has the brightest lighting. Unfortunately, I did not see the note on the door “ROSAK” which my LX told me abt it after I came out. I tried to open the door but it was stuck. Tried pulling the small lever until my finger sore, useless...the wood at the top of the door was uneven, which makes the door shut tight. So, I called LX, no one answer, called Yen Nee…as expected, she couldn’t hear her phone, thanks to the loud Chinese New Year songs on the TV, called Gavin, went straight to voice message (he did said his hp low batt just now), what a luck I had ! I called them alternately for few more times, even sent mssg to LX, still no one come to my aid. I saw two men talking outside the carpark from the window…was contemplating if I should call / wave to them for help. Nah…news spread very fast ! So, I decided to wait and kept calling few more times as my sweat started to roll down my forehead…ok, I thought perhaps Chris has reached and may be outside joining YN and Gavin…so I called him, but he was still in office, he said he will come now. I tried calling LX again….luckily this time he heard me and came to my rescue !! 10 mins in there…like a sauna !! I guess next time I will not use any toilet with doors that need to push hard to close AND read read read for any sign !! Gee…I thought it was just some scribbles on the door :{
Oh, btw, LX still treats me the same, but he actually was sending me home after dinner…Gavin called, so end up we met…for dinner (but I had earlier with LX) and also to look at the photos taken few weeks back at BBQ steamboat near LX’s house. Everyone look nice in the pix. Came home around 9.15 pm…bathed, washed my clothes, lepak abit…having my 3 in 1 Milo with Cereal, hungry liao ma. Will try to sleep earlier tonite. Hopefully can la.
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